Fatherhood

Typically a female pouring out her heart would write about motherhood, but today I am inspired to write about the other half. Every few months a conversation ensues at our house between myself and someone I will not name asking when he is going to have time to do what he wants on a weekend. Given where I've been at in my head lately - and he knows where I've been in my head as well - I remind him that right now the weekends tend to be about the kids activities. Thankfully he recovers quickly. All I know is I left this afternoon for a tea and felt a bit guilty about doing something alone when he was feeling edgy. All week long our oldest has been wanting to make a cardboard car for an event tomorrow night. What we both hoped would be an easier project became much more when our daughter drew out plans for what the car would look like. Two hours later I came home to a pink sedan with a sunroof, headlights and wheels. I'm almost at a loss for words.

Granted, I grew up in a different generation and dads today are much more engaged, but what he gave our daughter today was much more than a pink car. He gave her time and interest and excitement. Long before we were married, I shared all of my "daddy issues" and impressed upon him how vital his role would be in our children's lives. He will always be the first boy who fell in love with them. The joy I hear as I type takes my breath away. In the moments when I question whether or not he really enjoys being a dad - I know, but we've all done it ladies, right? - I will always remember a pink sedan. He already does so much for us and today, when he could have played Wii or folded laundry -another noble task-, he broke out bubblegum pink paint and made his girls smile. And he did it with a smile.

I never would have had the patience or creativity to do what he did today. I would have taken a shortcut or tried to talk our daughter out of her plans. I would have squashed her vision or maybe told her to go it alone. I would not have taken on the project with excitement and joy. Daddies are amazing creatures. In the beginning they feel so helpless because there isn't much they can do with a newborn. But as time passes and heartstrings attach, these men become the apple of their child's eye. I love that my husband fills a space that only he can fill. And I love that even though he would much rather being doing something for himself today, he gave of himself instead.